"Mavis" the Mondeo - a cautionary tale

You may recall that our trip to Spain was undertaken in "Mavis" the Mondeo (red car pictured here outside our old house), bought cheaply with a view to giving her a few weeks in the sunshine before taking her final journey to that scrap yard in the sky.

This is a cautionary tale of trying to do the right thing, frustration at not speaking Spanish, bureaucracy in Spain and hopefully some advice to all who come after us.

Shortly after arriving in Spain, we bought a new Spanish registered car. To our delight, the showroom offered to take Mavis off our hands, which was brilliant as it saved us the hassle of scapping her. So they sign off the UK registration document as having the car transferred to them, which next day I send off to DVLA. Off we drive in our new Kia into the Spanish sunset, to return at a later date to pick up the registration documents, which were not ready, although we did receive an official document authorising us to drive legally.

Four weeks later we receive a call from the garage. Could we go and collect the documents.........oh, and also there's a problem with the car which we need to discuss.

Arrive next morning and Mavis is still in the showroom where we left her. Apparently, as she is a UK registered car and had not been "imported" officially into Spain the garage could do nothing with her. The only thing to do would be for us to contact the British Consulate in Malaga and obtain a certificate that Mavis was my car and that she had legally entered Spain......taxed, tested & insured. Only taken four weeks to tell us this!!!!!

OK, off we go back home and send an email off to the Consulate explaining the situation. Two days later we receive a response; if we would like to come to Malaga (2 hours drive) to make a sworn declaration before the Consulate, she will issue a certificate.........cost €188 (approx £130). You've got to be joking, that's probably more than Mavis is worth!!. The long arm of rip off Britain even extends to Spain.

Next day Thursday, we ask a friend to ring the garage and tells them that we will pick the car up in the morning and sort it out ourselves , which we duly did.

Our frustration and bemusement has subsided overnight so calm and collected off we tootle to the scrap yard, approximately 30kms from Olvera. Si, si the manager says, no problemo, come back on Monday and we will issue a certificate. So we left Mavis at the yard and drove home safe in the knowledge that all was well.

We turn up on Monday, no manager......he is on vacation says a very apologetic and helpful employee. Could we come back on Wednesday. OK....this isn't doing much for my carbon footprint or global warming all these trips to and fro!!

Wednesday arrives, so do we. The manager will here in ten minutes. Twenty five minutes go by and the previously helpful employee calls us into the office where he is sitting behind the desk attempting to complete a scrap certificate for Mavis......who by this time is up on the ramp having her oil and petrol drained out. He is copying from a previous certificate and hits a problem as he has to ring somebody. This somebody tells him that before he can issue a certificate, we have to obtain a reference number from the "Trafico" (Vehicle Registration Department) in Cadiz, which has to be taken to our local police station for them to certify that Mavis can die peacefully. By now I am wishing I could die peacefully!!!!!

So off we go back home, and ask a friend to accompany us to the local police station where we can explain the situation and hopefully get it sorted. No says the policeman, as Mavis has not been officially imported into Spain, neither the police or the Trafico need to get involved or want to know. The car can just be scrapped and a certificate issued by the scrapyard. Aaaargh......!!!!!! At this stage I could have a numero quattro without going to the hairdresser.

So we ring the scrapyard and inform the lady that answers, not the helpful employee, of the situation and she says yes....that is correct and they will issue a scrap certificate and send it to us in the post.

The moral of this tale is.........chill, chill and chill again. All this has been caused by our inability to communicate effectively in the native tongue of our adopted country, to a lesser extent by the red tape not always understood by the people of Spain. We will learn eventually.